To D-Blog, or Not To D-Blog

Over the past week or so, I have plopped myself into the middle of a veritable gaggle of D-Mom bloggers. Moms whose children have Type 1 Diabetes, and who blog about their experiences and how their family life is impacted by this disease. I’ve found some really great moms out there, women who are carving time out of their overly busy lives, dedicating some of their own tiny bits of “me time” to share their own experiences, wit, wisdom, and knowledge, and to support others whose families have been invaded by this very unwelcomed guest. There are lots more D-Mom blogs out there I haven’t had time to explore yet, and I’ve added several new links to “My Blog World” so I can follow these ladies writings. But I want to particularly spotlight Laura, who has provided a wealth of first-hand information on the OmniPod, as well as taking time to chat with me. And, Meri who is raising four boys, three of whom have diabetes, because she just cracks me up. Even if you don’t know that much about diabetes, her post Rookie Mistake will make you laugh, even though the subject's really not funny. But, that’s Meri’s gift to all of us D-Moms; getting us to let go just a little bit and find some humor in our difficulties. I deeply appreciate every D-Mom I’ve found for being so honest in sharing their lives with the rest of us. It helps the rest of us lighten up just a bit and cut ourselves some slack from time to time.

So, that leads me to the question, “Do I want to have a blog dedicated to diabetes and its impact on our family?” Do I want to share our everyday trials and triumphs of living with this disease with the blog world? Share the good, the bad, and the ugly on a daily or semi-weekly basis? Express my own thoughts and feelings about this daily rollercoaster ride for others to read and possibly find comfort in? No. I don’t. It seems selfish now that I’ve said it. But, so much of my time, my energy, my thoughts, my LIFE has been eaten up by this disease over the past year. Like taking care of a newborn, you have to be on call at all times. Every couple of hours you’ve got to feed and tend to it. There are supplies to keep stocked up and emergency snacks to keep on hand and meals to plan and cook on schedule, just to keep things running smoothly. And then there’s the cholic, and the teething, and the little illnesses, and all the unexpected hiccups along the way. You spend just about all of your time either tending to or thinking about the care of this little creature. And, when that child is finally asleep, and all of your “have to’s” are done, and you finally have a few minutes of peace, sometimes you just don’t want to have to think about that little bundle for a little while. You want to think of other things. Things that don’t make you frazzled, that don’t keep you up worrying at night, that don’t make you cry with frustration at times, that don’t stress you out and age you prematurely and turn your hair gray.

There have been days on end when I could think of nothing but this disease and its impact on my son and my family. It has aged me, it has sucked the life from me, and at times it has made me forget how blessed our lives are. How blessed I am. I am not going to give this brutal disease any more of my life that I already have, and that I have to in order to keep my son alive and well. When this monster goes down for a nap, when T-Bear is running around happy and smiling and free from the burden of his disease for just a little while, I don’t want to have to think about diabetes. I don’t want to write about it. I don’t want to give it one more minute of my life. I just want to enjoy my son, my family, and my life.

So, I’m going to keep blogging about our family life. Diabetes will be a part of it, but as small a part of it as I can possibly make it. There in the background, always present, and occasionally in the spotlight, but not the focus of my thoughts and writing time and energy. For the past year, our family blog has been good therapy for me because it has given me someplace to focus my mind and thoughts and attention other than diabetes. It has been a record of all of the goodness and blessings in our lives, of our adventures, and of the things that we enjoyed together, and of the things that made us laugh. It has reminded me, “Hey, I need to take a picture of that and blog about it,” and is providing us with an on-going family history. And it has given me something to pull up and look at and re-visit when I need to be reminded of how good our lives are, despite this disease.

Yep. Diabetes is in our lives. But, it’s not all there is to our lives. And, I’m keeping it in its place.

So, thank you to all you D-Mom Bloggers out there for sharing with the world all the ins and outs of living with diabetes, so I don't have to. You're all a blessing for what you're willing to do.